I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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