We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
