I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
