Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
