Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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