so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize