I want to walk on stilts...naked
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize