ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
