WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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