If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
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