at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Randomize