So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
