Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
My butt remains clenched, sir.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
