I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
It's just like the Real World with babies
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Randomize
