Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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