Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
