In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I want to fling myself into the sun
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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