I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize