I wanna bring you to show and tell
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
