Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
