So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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