Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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