I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
