so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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