but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Randomize
