so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
