mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
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