did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize