it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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