angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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