Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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