so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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