Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize