I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
