Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
