I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Randomize
