Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
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