He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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