Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Randomize
