But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I'm jealous of your bromance
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Randomize
