just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
