Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
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