And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize
