Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
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