i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
there is glitter all over my balls
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