Sacagawea was the original milf.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
