Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Randomize
