new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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