and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I understand Curling. That high.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize