how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize